4808 - 'Uthman and Abu Bakr, the two sons of Abu Shaybah, and Muhammad ibn al-Sabbah al-Bazzaz narrated to us, they said: Sharik narrated to us, from al-Miqdam ibn Shurayh, from his father, who said:

I asked 'A'ishah about going out to the countryside (al-badawah). She said: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, used to go out to these elevated places (al-tila'). And once he wanted to go out to the countryside, so he sent me a she-camel from the camels of charity that had been marked for sacrifice. He said to me: "O 'A'ishah, be gentle, for gentleness has never been present in anything except that it adorned it, and it has never been removed from anything except that it disgraced it."(1)

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It was also recorded by Ibn Abi Shaybah 8/512, Ahmad in his Musnad (16802), 'Abd ibn Humayd (504), al-Darimi in his Sunan (2793), Ibn Abi 'Asim (1091), al-Bayhaqi in al-Asma' wa al-Sifat pp. 51-52, and al-Tabarani in Makarim al-Akhlaq (23) via multiple chains from Hammad ibn Salamah, from him.
It was also recorded by al-Khara'iti in Makarim al-Akhlaq (678) via the chain of Musa ibn Isma'il al-Tabudhaki, from Hammad, from Humayd alone, from him.
It was also recorded by Ahmad in his Musnad (16805) from Aswad, from Hammad, from Yunus alone, from him.
It is corroborated by the hadith of 'A'ishah recorded by Muslim (2593), the hadith of Anas ibn Malik recorded by al-Bazzar (1961) and (1962), the hadith of Abu Hurayrah recorded by Ibn Majah (3688) and al-Bazzar (1964) with a sound chain, and the hadith of 'Ali, may Allah be pleased with him, recorded by Ahmad (902) and al-Bazzar (1960).

His saying "gentle" (rafiq): al-Sindi said, meaning: he treats people with gentleness and kindness, and burdens them according to their capacity.
His saying "loves gentleness": on the part of the servant.
His saying "over harshness" (al-'unf), with a damma on the 'ayn and sukun on the nun: the opposite of gentleness, meaning: whoever calls people to guidance with gentleness and kindness is better than one who calls with harshness and severity, when the situation accepts both. But if the situation only accepts one, then that one is what is required. And Allah Most High knows best the reality of the matter.

(1) The marfu' portion at the end of the hadith is authentic. The story of going out to the countryside was narrated exclusively by Sharik — and he is Ibn 'Abdullah al-Nakha'i — with this wording, and he is weak in memory. This hadith has already been mentioned by the author at number (2478). See the complete takhrij and commentary there.